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& so does the Worthiness of Money For several weeks, I've been urging myself to make a change. Over the past year, I've felt like I've been pushing myself too hard in a way that just didn't feel right. It's become clear to me that my focus should be on my studies. Letting go of my old business, Beyor Bookkeeper, LLC, at the end of 2023, marked a significant shift for me. Money has always been a source of tension, but it took on a new significance when I started to move away from my previous venture and pursue something that truly resonated with me. Money has always been a secret in my family. My dad was a silent man. If you asked him a question he wanted to say no to he'd just pretend he didn't hear you. This was usually the case with money. He had a history of taking care of his family, from his parents on up to his children, with money and belongings. At his funeral, one after another described him as, "A good provider". It's no wonder I feel trapped when it comes to money. With my father's passing, it feels like not only did I lose him, but I also lost a certain way of dealing with finances. It's heartbreaking but true. My Dad was a sweet man in many ways. He was silly and kind. He was the one person who had the right thing to say when I came out. But damn - when it came to being there for me in other ways he left me short of words and actions that showed that he believed in my value to make and keep money of my own. A week before my father's passing, I chose to tap into my savings to sustain myself while I focused on my studies and refrain from pursuing an income for the next 10 months. I aimed to prioritize endeavors that align with my goals and avoid allowing financial concerns to dictate decisions that may not serve my best interests. Weeks following my father's passing, I transferred the funds from my savings to a more accessible account for living expenses. The next day, I stumbled upon the exact amount of cash tucked away. It felt like a silent reassurance from my dad, as if he were saying, "I've got your back—again." Had he been alive, I would have grappled with feelings of guilt and indebtedness. It's disheartening how death can alter perceptions and dynamics so profoundly. It's sad how death can change everything. Why is it that my worthiness has to come from death? After leaving my bookkeeping business, I started to feel aimless. That business had provided a semblance of validation, adhering to my father's notion of a conventional profession. However, it never quite satisfied his expectations, as he persistently inquired about my pursuit of a CPA license. Despite my explanations that I chose bookkeeping to leverage my existing skills for personal freedom, I got the hunch that he thought I was lazy or not "smart" enough. Back when I applied to RISD (Rhode Island School of Design), someone mentioned to me years later that my dad had this idea that he wouldn't need to worry about footing the bill because RISD was too competitive, and I probably wouldn't make the cut anyway. But you know me, when I set my mind on something, I'm determined to make it happen. It's funny, I inherited that stubborn streak from my dad, even though he may not have realized it. Still, knowing that he harbored doubts about my abilities stung, and it's something that lingers in my thoughts to this day. I try to counter that narrative by reminding myself that I'm capable of achieving anything I set my mind to, even if those closest to me underestimate my potential. But let's be real, his silence and the possibility that he didn't fully believe in me can't help but cast a shadow over my aspirations, making it harder to pursue my dreams with unwavering confidence. That being said, the secret cash in the drawer, changed the script. It made me think that maybe what I believed or thought I knew about my dad was all wrong. That all he wanted was what he said to me that day when I came out to him about being Polyamorous in his office. "All I want is for you to be happy, are you happy?"

I embarked on a weekend at the Women's FEST of CAMP Rehoboth with the intention of meeting like-minded individuals who were confident, inspiring, and respectful of consent. To attract these people, I knew I had to embody these qualities myself. What would I have to do and be that I didn’t already do on a regular habitual basis, was the question I posed myself. On my drive down to Rehoboth, Delaware, I listened to Don Miguel Ruiz's The Four Agreements audiobook. According to the book, when you are impeccable with your words, don't take things personally, don't make assumptions, and always do your best, you will have a sense of ease and less conflict. However, as I continued listening, I became agitated by his use of language like fight, war, and battle. Although the message was undoubtedly insightful, I found myself unable to overlook the contradictory nature of those words in relation to his message. Upon arriving at my friend's place for the weekend, my mind kept going back to a situation from the previous year's event. I had met a group of people through a party hosted by someone I didn't know at the time, but we became friends through monthly phone chats thereafter. Spending time with that group of people ignited a desire in me for a community that I could return to year after year at the Women's FEST. However I learned quickly that I wasn't welcome in the party goers’ group chat because it was only for women of color. While I understood the importance of having a safe space for underrepresented groups, I couldn't help but feel excluded and isolated from a community that I had wished to be spending time with at the next Women’s Fest. Do you ever find yourself creating narratives and imagining potential futures that you never share with anyone, only to have them become unfulfilled expectations that leave you feeling unsatisfied and disappointed? That's exactly what happened to me. I attended the first dance of the Women's FEST with trepidation, holding onto my dreams but unsure whether I was welcome in any groups from the previous year. It's ironic how our fears can make us act in ways that bring about the very thing we fear, creating a self-fulfilling prophecy. At the dance, I said hi to my friend but didn't fully engage with her due to my fear that her group wasn't welcoming. It was only when I confronted her with how I felt about her not seeking me out and staying with the chat group that we were able to learn what was really going on. She told me that she didn't approach me because she assumed I already had a close-knit group of my own. By confronting my own assumptions, expectations, and fears, I discovered the truth. Emotions serve as indicators of potential areas for personal development and growth, rather than something to fight against. This is why I felt uneasy when Don Miguel Ruiz used words like "war," "fight," and "battle." Making peace with and accepting our shadow selves is the key to uncovering the truth of our authentic selves. I realized that I wasn't actively seeking the community I desired. Rather than taking things personally, I could have stood in my truth of belonging and invited people to join "my" friendship. Although I didn't have enough time to do so, I learned that next time, I would prepare by communicating my desires and not letting my fears prevent me from extending an invitation to those ready to join me. Consider this challenge: Remember that your emotions are not obstacles, but rather, they can provide insight and guidance. Take the time to explore them and acknowledge their presence, and don't immediately assume that the narratives they create are accurate. Instead, listen to them, engage with them, and try to uncover the truth of what they are revealing. It's important to recognize that what we experience is a reflection of ourselves. With this in mind, ask yourself, "Who do I want to be at this moment?" and choose accordingly. If you need help or support in finding your authentic self, please don’t hesitate to reach out to me. I offer workshops and one-on-one coaching to help seekers on their journey. For free resources to help you tap into your authentic voice, sign up by visiting reneebeyor.com/free-resources. Ray Beyor, owner of RAY Life Coaching, provides her clients with resources and practices that clarify their values, set steps toward their purpose, and master confidence while facing fears with patience, compassion, and accountability. Ray’s training in attachment theory, codependency, yoga, meditation, polyamory, consent work, dance, and astrology is used to guide her clients into their authentic and abundant selves. To schedule a free call or learn more, please visit:www.reneebeyor.com.

I read The 4-Hour Workweek by Tim Ferris right before I started my Virtual Bookkeeping business in 2012. It was a fresh perspective on how to create time by utilizing the inexpensive online workforce available to more and more people. Although providing valuable insights, this notion is rooted in an old paradigm of individual success and personal liberation, neglecting the broader societal context that now has come even more transparent. Its focus on escaping the traditional work structure and maximizing personal gains overlooks systemic issues, social and environmental responsibility, and the power of collaboration and community. With the arrival of Pluto in Aquarius, a transformative cosmic event set to begin in November 2024 and last for the next 20 years, we are entering a period of significant social change and innovation. The last time Pluto was in Aquarius, from 1778 to 1798, we witnessed monumental shifts in society, such as the American Revolution, French Revolution, Uranus was discovered and Bill of Rights ratified. It was a time when marginalized voices challenged the social elite, paving the way for greater equality and progress. The COVID-19 pandemic has further highlighted the flaws and inequalities inherent in many traditional jobs. It has forced us to reevaluate our work-life balance and seek alternative paths to freedom and fulfillment. I am deeply committed to supporting individuals who find themselves trapped in work environments that stifle their growth, silence their voices, and exert control over them. Having personally experienced the detrimental effects of such an environment, I know what it feels like to be burdened with debt, struggling with obesity, battling depression, and enduring chronic pain that constantly undermines my well-being. I recognize that there are genuine reasons why people may be hesitant to make changes in their lives. However, I strongly believe that now, before the onset of Pluto in Aquarius, is the opportune moment to take action. By making a move now, you will have ample time to hone your skills and adapt to the shifting tides that lie ahead. This is the perfect opportunity to prepare yourself to navigate the transformative era that awaits us. Here are some steps to navigate this transformative era and find freedom by redefining the word “work” on our own terms: Discover your direction: Identify your purpose and passion, as they will serve as your guiding light through the challenges and uncertainties. Having a clear sense of why you want to create your own path will fuel your journey. Your true purpose will not only serve you but inevitably serve those you touch. Assess your assets: Take stock of your existing skills, experiences, and resources. You already possess something valuable to start a business, and if you doubt it, I am here to help you uncover the wealth of authentic abundance within. Build confidence through education and bartering: Certifications and targeted education can boost your confidence and provide credibility. In the early stages, consider offering free services or engaging in bartering to gain referrals and test the market. Keep overhead low: Start with simplicity and focus on delivering value rather than striving for perfection. Avoid unnecessary financial commitments and invest wisely in line with your needs. Embrace self-leadership: Recognize that this is your business, and you have the power to shape it according to your vision and values. Align your work with your purpose, even if it means turning down opportunities that don't align with your core principles. Prioritize self-care: Take care of yourself physically, mentally, and emotionally. Cultivate daily practices that bring you joy and surround yourself with positive influences. Visualize the benefits you desire and nourish the seeds of your dreams. Practice patience: Building a successful business takes time and effort. Stay committed, enjoy the process, and trust that your efforts will bear fruit in due time. Foster innovation: Pluto in Aquarius calls for unique voices and creative innovation. Seek inspiration from moments of stillness and allow yourself to think outside the box. Embrace change and view mistakes as opportunities for growth. In conclusion, while I appreciate the valuable lessons from "The 4-Hour Workweek," it is important to acknowledge that the economic crash of 2008 and the pandemic of 2020 have shifted the importance of integrating our work with our communities. The power of our lifestyles and choices cannot be underestimated in shaping the world we live in. As we collectively embark on the journey of personal empowerment and strive for authentic freedom, we hold the key to reshape our world and create a prosperous future for all. If you find yourself stuck in a job that is no longer serving you, please don't hesitate to reach out to me. I offer workshops and one-to-one coaching to help you navigate your options toward a more empowered life. To learn more about my free resources and my upcoming events signup by visiting: www.raylifecoaching.com/free-resources Ray Beyor, owner of RAY Life Coaching, provides her clients with resources and practices that clarify their values, set steps toward their purpose, and master confidence while facing fears with patience, compassion, and accountability. Ray’s training in attachment theory, codependency, yoga, meditation, polyamory, consent work, dance, and astrology is used to guide her clients into their authentic and abundant selves. To schedule a free call or learn more, please visit: www.raylifecoaching.com.

I love when people say, "I can't meditate" or "I am bad a meditating". We think that meditation is something special and in many ways it ISN'T. If anything it is INTENTIONAL. Instead of it just happening in the shower, in bed, or outside as you soak up the sun, it happens because you decide to do it INTENTIONALLY. Silence and Stillness tend to be the two things that bring up angst in most of us. In a world where we are always going and figuring it out, it seems counterproductive to not do and just listen. Brought up as a women in this world who also has a strong emotional and intuitive sense, I know that I need to tap into that inner body to have a sound mind so that I can do what is truly important and act with gentleness instead of with carelessness and unconscious habits. Too often we just do and regret our decisions or blame one another for what went "wrong". Meditation gives us the tools to stop, take note, and decide based on our core instead of jumping to conclusions that may be based on our habit of finding fault in ourselves and others. So I challenge you to try meditation but to also open your mind to what Meditation could look like... For example, although you see people sit cross legged, meditation does not have to look any kind of way. I invite those who come to CHANGE IT UP. Be brave and DO IT YOUR WAY either on your own or come to my session and INTEND to be you while meditating. That means, say "Hey, Ray, I am going to be moving a bit while you do the guided meditation. My eyes will be open and I will be considerate of others." Or maybe your way is to stand, sit in a chair, or lie down. This is your time to INTEND to tap into yourself. Outside of the body being restless and needing to be in another type of state, meditation can bring up thoughts and movement in the mind and inner body as well. Meditation is more about compassion for self then being quiet. Listening to our thoughts is the first way to start the Compassion Journey. With compassion we open the door to giving ourselves time to be where we are. Emotions or stressful thoughts are fleeting just like everything "this too shall pass". Meditation is allowing yourself to recognize that this loud mind and feeling body is what is happening all the time when you just act from unconscious habits throughout your day. So many new meditators say, "I'm not good at meditation, instead of my mind getting quieter, it gets louder." I want you to understand that it may seem that way, but in truth, it's that you have ignored the voice for so long you didn't even know what you were basing your decisions on all this time. This loud voice is good because now you can be aware why you have the life you do. By listening and holding compassion, we are also led to forgive ourselves for all the things we may judge ourselves for in the past. This action of forgiveness is the moment you allow yourself to grow and learn. You can make decisions now based on where you want to be, not where you've been. YOU CAN CHANGE YOUR MIND! Good luck out there and just remember we are all suffering.

Owning my work and embracing the value of my income has been a challenging journey. I've had to unlearn deeply ingrained lessons and remind myself that I deserve more than just meeting expectations—I deserve to exceed them. One of my greatest struggles has been placing others' opinions above my own, constantly striving to please everyone instead of expressing myself in my unique way. The word "work" evokes a deep sense of dread, as explored by Jeremy Seabrook in his article "The language of labouring reveals its tortured roots" published in The Guardian. Seabrook highlights the historical connection between work and persecution, evident in the Gothic word wrikan, as well as the definition of work as "toil," which conveys the notions of fighting and struggling. It wasn't until 2015, when my Virtual Bookkeeping business began to flourish, that I finally started feeling a sense of worthiness and strength. The ability to carve my own path, shielded from the onslaught of opinions disguised as facts that often accompanied traditional workplaces, allowed me to take charge and be the decision-maker. Now, as I embark on my journey as a Life Coach, I remain acutely aware of the perils I faced in office environments. There, the voices of others dictated how I should be, what I should do, and when and where I should do it. Even today, I find myself falling into the habit of following rather than confidently standing in my own power. Just yesterday, I unconsciously succumbed to the pressure of writing this article in a manner that didn't align with my natural style. Throughout the process, I felt a growing sense of annoyance, yet I persisted despite the misfit. It wasn't until this morning, during my meditation session, that I allowed myself to truly listen to those feelings. They served as a reminder that I was falling into the same trap once again—prioritizing the voices of others over my own. I had forgotten the true purpose of my writing, drowned out by someone else's opinions dictating what they believed I should write. Discovering independence within your work sets off a profound chain reaction, unlocking new and exhilarating dimensions in every aspect of life. In my personal journey, taking the leap to start my own business in 2012 became the catalyst for transformative experiences. It empowered me to achieve physical fitness, cultivate a chosen family, and delve into activities I truly loved. The freedom of entrepreneurship allowed me to explore realms previously unattainable while operating under the rules of a traditional employer. Back then, I couldn't have fathomed the extent of my accomplishments by simply following my own guidance instead of adhering to someone else's playbook. Work no longer needs to be a constant struggle; it can be approached in a way that aligns with your inner wisdom. Let me be your guide in honing the invaluable skill of tuning in to the resounding voice within, eager to break free from its limitations and lead you towards a life overflowing with fulfillment and joy. If you find yourself stuck in a job that no longer serves you, do not hesitate to reach out. I offer transformative workshops and one-to-one coaching sessions designed to help you navigate your options and embrace a life of empowerment. Sign up for my free resources and stay informed about upcoming events by visiting: www.raylifecoaching.com/free-resources. Ray Beyor, owner of RAY Life Coaching, provides her clients with resources and practices that clarify their values, set steps toward their purpose, and master confidence while facing fears with patience, compassion, and accountability. Ray’s training in attachment theory, codependency, yoga, meditation, polyamory, consent work, dance, and astrology is used to guide her clients into their authentic and abundant selves. To schedule a free call or learn more, please visit: www.raylifecoaching.com.

I had been silent for so long that I forgot what was true for me. I learned very young that silence is powerful. It can speak volumes but watch out it may not always be speaking what you meant to say. My dad was and still is an unconscious master of silence. Now I understand a non-answer to mean "No" because he doesn't know how to say "No". I can't recollect a time he said no, especially to a question I posed. As the youngest daughter of a financially secretive and pretending to be recovering alcoholic family, I learned that saying "No" was not okay, the truth was in the silence, and that females are better seen than heard. Just like my dad, I became an unconscious master. I believed I could read between the lines of silence, read people's minds, and get my way with manipulation. This is the world of a co-dependent child of an alcoholic family system. Silence became a sign of loneliness and disconnection. This all sounds so oppressive; however, I think most of us live in a culture that tells us who to be and what is not allowed to be ours. In one way or another; either through omission or restriction we learn what is seen as successful and what we have to do to get it. In this environment, most of us either strive to be accepted by pushing ourselves to be something we never asked ourselves if we truly want or we sit back and believe we will never fit in. You're probably wondering how this all relates to polyamory. You may be able to relate it to Coming Out... We hear "coming out" and think it means someone is gay or not heterosexually normative. So yes, once I stopped closeting myself and became more social, I had to face what was mirrored back to me. I started to do that in 2014 when I went to swing dance class and socials. The social aspect and risking being bad at swing dance were scary enough, but I think what I was really scared of was who I was on the inside would eventually come out and I would have to own up to it. That is exactly what happened to me. The more I had a social life, got in touch with my body, and started conversing with people, the more I realized how I my differences would be noticed. When a new friend confessed that she had been in a polyamorous relationship, I thought she must have known I was probably polyamorous as well, or at least I knew I was. I had never heard that word but as she described polyamory, it struck a cord in my soul. I was forever changed and ashamed that I wasn't being the person I knew myself to be. I had always prided myself as an out person who could tell people I was bisexual. I wasn't - I too was lying to myself and everyone else around me. None of my close friends even knew I was bisexual. But now, I realized, I was hiding not just that. I was hiding from myself that I was polyamorous because I didn't even know that was an option for me. It made me wonder how many other things I didn't know. I wonder how many other people are experiencing this disconnect. Maybe something doesn't feel right but you don't know how to be you in this world. Polyamory was just a mirror into my soul reflecting back to me some of my core values. Freedom, Consent, and Authenticity are some of the values that were remembered. Freedom is a big word. For me, autonomy is one way I define Freedom. At age 35, in 2012, I worked for two businesses that had probably all too familiar practices of diminishing female roles in the workplace, name-calling, bullying, and many other abusive communication styles. I realized I had become a victim of my environment and upbringing. I was to learn how to stand up for myself. Now I am motivated to show others how to do that for themselves. Coming from a silent family, I had to bust through the training of the past. It is still a struggle today to be loud and out but I know this is the only way to healing. At that time, I chose to move out of the suffocating work environment by slowly creating a business of my own and finding a position where I had more autonomy and flexibility until I could be full-time in my business. So what I am saying is the freedom to be yourself is key. However one needs to set boundaries around them that will promote conscious consent and know themselves enough to be authentic. All of these values made me realize that I could only change how I communicated with myself in order to see a new reality reflected back to me. I had to change my mindset and believe, enough, to imagine something different for myself. That is where I can help anyone who is looking to get to the next place in their life. I will share with you the tools I used and still use to this day to get back to me and bravely strive for the unimaginable. If you need help or support in finding your authentic self, please don’t hesitate to reach out to me. I offer workshops and one-on-one coaching to help seekers on their journey. For free resources to help you tap into your authentic voice, sign up by visiting reneebeyor.com/free-resources. Ray Beyor, owner of RAY Life Coaching, provides her clients with resources and practices that clarify their values, set steps toward their purpose, and master confidence while facing fears with patience, compassion, and accountability. Ray’s training in attachment theory, codependency, yoga, meditation, polyamory, consent work, dance, and astrology is used to guide her clients into their authentic and abundant selves. To schedule a free call or learn more, please visit: www.reneebeyor.com.

How do you realize your dreams? There is a three-step process I will share with you that will help you do exactly that!

A week ago, I had a conversation with someone who had recently begun dating a person practicing polyamory for the first time. As both individuals were new to polyamory, it came as no surprise that they had numerous questions for me. As a coach and bookkeeper, my value lies in the experience I bring to the table. However, I sometimes overlook the knowledge I possess that others may lack. With my background experience, I can identify the questions my clients may not even know to ask. The key lies not in merely finding answers, but in asking the right questions that lead to uncovering the truth. During our discussion, the newly polyamorous individual mentioned, "I can't attend that event because the person I'm dating said it would cross their boundary. They're going with their other partner." In response, I explained, "That sounds more like a rule than a boundary." I've noticed that when we believe we are setting boundaries, we often attempt to hold others accountable for upholding our own boundaries. However, in doing so, we inadvertently disempower ourselves by placing others in control of our own needs. So, how can we assert our wants and needs while upholding our own boundaries? Here are three steps to help us on this empowering journey. Following that, I will share the advice I gave the new polyamorous individual regarding this particular rule. “When you say ‘yes’ to others, make sure you’re not saying ‘no’ to yourself.” – Paulo Coelho 3 Steps To Setting Your Own Boundaries 1. What is bothering you and why? I find the hardest part about boundaries is stopping for a moment and really listening to why you feel what you feel. For instance, in the case above, the person I sat down with expressed annoyance that they couldn't go to that event. The question you may want to ask yourself in that instance is why? For them it was that they wanted to feel FREE to go to any even they chose. 2. Stop Assuming and Start Discovering The next crucial step is to define with utmost clarity what you are absolutely not okay with, what you can agree to, and the consequences you are willing to accept in order to attain your desires. In a recent conversation, the individual I sat down with realized their annoyance stemmed from their partner's failure to establish their own boundaries. Instead of honestly expressing, "Hey, I prefer attending events with one person at a time and I feel uncomfortable when you're present while I'm with my other partner. Can we find a mutually agreeable solution?" their partner chose to avoid open communication and imposed a rigid rule on their interactions, leaving them feeling controlled and managed. In truth, most of us fall into a pattern of not fully communicating our needs. We either rely on others to dictate how we should be, or we trample over others to fulfill our own desires. While these approaches may seem momentarily effective, they are ultimately unsustainable. By relying on these methods, we may inadvertently overlook the fact that we never truly possess our own power. Furthermore, in both cases, we remain unaware of our genuine needs and the underlying reasons behind them. To break free from this pattern, it is essential to stop assuming and start discovering through open and honest communication. 3. Standing up for yourself : The path to Belonging Beneath the surface, this manner of "setting boundaries" rests on a faulty foundation of control, manipulation, and insecurity. We fear facing our own needs because we worry that others will reject us. Ultimately, it all boils down to a fundamental need for BELONGING. However, let me make this clear: belonging can only emerge from within. We cannot compel anyone to like us, desire us, or belong to us, nor can they do the same to us. I can barely get myself to add a new easy habit, why do I think I could change someone else? That being said, authentic boundaries require courage, as they proclaim to the world that we are important enough to have a voice and to fully enjoy our lives. They hold power because, in order to stand up for our needs, we must first deeply understand ourselves, accept others as they are (which entails truly seeing them), and lovingly let go of their opinions because we trust in the healing energy of being authentic to ourselves. Before I leave you, I will share with you what I told that newbee poly-person. "You can ask for what you want. You can set your own boundaries even when others are not. For example here's an idea of what you can say to your partner. "Thank you for sharing what you feel uncomfortable with. How you feel is important to me. I now want to share with you what I absolutely need in a relationship and what I am willing to agree to around this topic. After which, I'd like to talk about how that feels for you and how we can make this work for both of us. " TIP: Start SMALL in your everyday experience: Practice your boundary setting and follow through on yourself with small items in your life. For example, maybe you always do something that you know leads you to be disappointed in the end. Do these five steps and see how it works out for you: 1) Ask yourself, why do I feel this way when I do this? 2) What am I getting by doing this? (BENEFITS?) 3) Ask yourself what kind of person do you want to be in this scenario? 4) What is the line in the sand for this activity? (What will I not accept into my life anymore?) 5) Dream up 3 scenarios that could happen that would make it hard to keep your BOUNDARY with yourself around this thing and find work arounds that will help you keep on your path. CHECK OUT the Mini-sode that provides an example of how you can try this out in your life. If you found this article helpful, check out my PEP TALK subscription where you will get guidance on a topic each week just like this! Also subscribe to my YouTube Channel where I make videos on these topics in depth. If you need help or support in finding your authentic self, please don't hesitate to reach out to me. I offer workshops and one-on-one coaching to help seekers on their journey. For free resources to help you tap into your authentic voice sign up by going to reneebeyor.com/free-resources.

As the lingering aroma of my lunch filled the air, I was lost in thought as I washed the last few dishes in the sink. Looking out of the kitchen window, my gaze fell upon a barren forest, nestled atop a rocky hillside on a cold spring day in Connecticut. Suddenly, I noticed not one, but two, no, perhaps six deer standing on between the trees, gazing back at me. The sight of the camouflaged deer brought to mind a curious theory I had heard about - the "Invisible Ships Phenomenon" - which suggests that sometimes our minds fail to register what is happening right in front of us, just like the native peoples who supposedly didn't see Columbus's ships. This realization left me pondering how often we may be oblivious to the things around us that do not fit our field of experience. Have you ever experienced an "epiphany" that made you say to yourself, "Why didn't I think of that earlier?" It's like the answer was right in front of our eyes, but we couldn't see it. This is a common problem we face, and I believe that the key to solving most of our problems lies in being able to see what is right in front of us. The challenge is that we may not be ready to see it yet. We may lack the necessary experience or perspective. So, what would make us ready? What would we need to do, be, or think to see the possibilities and opportunities waiting for us? Intermission for a Story from my life at the Frameshop at age 23... "Calling it to You" Every time a customer would come to pick up their finished framed art, I would get this uneasy feeling in my stomach. I was always afraid that something would go wrong. The frame shop was so disorganized that the piece may not be labeled right, or it may not actually be finished. On one particular day, I was exceptionally stressed due to customer complaints, and of course, I had a customer come to the desk to pick up a piece, and I could not find it for the life of me. I searched high and low, but it was nowhere to be found. That's when my cool and collected manager came to the rescue. He was always calm, and in a matter of seconds, he found it. I was flabbergasted; it was right in front of me the whole time. I couldn't believe how quickly he found it, and it made me wonder how he did it. That's when I realized that my energy was the biggest factor in not seeing it. My nerves were giving off a signal that the framed art did not resonate with, and therefore, I would not see it. However, my boss was calm and believed that it was right there, even though he didn't even work in the frame shop. He had no reason to believe otherwise. I learned that calling something to you is just that. You have to get in resonance with it. How would it feel to receive it? Get there, and it will come! It's easy to become frustrated and think that there is no way forward. However, giving up might actually be the key to finding the answer. Sometimes we need to let go of what we think we know and approach the problem with a fresh perspective. Here's a secret to uncovering any answer, whether it's a lost item or a solution to a problem. What I call The Bridge to Opportunities First, ask yourself why the item is lost or why the problem is not solved. What can you learn from this situation? Next, forgive yourself for not knowing or getting it right. Finally, let it go and move forward as if the answer is already there. Act like you'll be okay either way, and then it will appear when you least expect it. This idea can be applied to the theory of Camouflage or the "Invisible Ships Phenomenon." Our minds and the energy those thoughts give off can act as camouflage, making it difficult to see what is right in front of us. We need to believe in the possibility and call it forward, even if it sounds hokey. If this article resonated with you, write "Bridge to Opportunities" in a DM and receive my free meditations link.

As a curious child, I stumbled upon the Book of the Dead, also known as Bardo Thodol, when I was just thirteen years old. Growing up, my father had a habit of giving me multiple nicknames, leaving me uncertain of which one truly belonged to me. Although this childhood experience may initially appear unrelated, it surprisingly connects to the concept of nothingness. Before I left for college, my father bestowed upon me the nickname "Bardo." While he was not aware of its meaning, I certainly was. Bardo is the Tibetan Buddhist term for the state of existence between death and rebirth. . Interestingly, my given name, Renee, translates to "Rebirth" or "Reborn" in French. This nickname resonated deeply within me as it symbolized a profound transition and my purpose on this earth. So, what does all of this have to do with nothingness? Well, I believe that Bardo, in a way, represents a form of nothingness. It exists in the liminal space before rebirth and after death—the threshold just before the creation of something new. With this personal connection in mind, we delve into the exploration of nothingness and its transformative power. Let us uncover the wonders that lie within the embrace of silence and stillness, drawing inspiration from my own journey and the stories of creation that highlight the significance of starting from nothing. Before we proceed, it's important to clarify that this article does not argue for "creationism" or dispute the reality of evolution. Evolution is an established fact. Instead, our focus is to shed light on how the notion of nothingness or doing nothing can remarkably benefit us by tapping into a wellspring of inner knowledge. The ancients understood this and used language to elucidate concepts that may be difficult to explain without scientific terminology. "The Tibetan term bardo, or “intermediate state,” is not just a reference to the afterlife. It also refers more generally to these moments when gaps appear, interrupting the continuity that we otherwise project onto our lives. In American culture, we sometimes refer to this as having the rug pulled out from under us, or feeling ungrounded. These interruptions in our normal sense of certainty are what is being referred to by the term bardo. But to be precise, bardo refers to that state in which we have lost our old reality and it is no longer available to us." By Pema Khandro Rinpoche In the beginning, it always seems to come down to doing nothing. Even in creation stories across cultures, life emerges from nothingness or Ex Nihilo in Latin. It's a concept that can be challenging for us to grasp, yet it holds tremendous power. Why? Because within nothingness lies the essence—the juice of life. In various creation mythologies, water is depicted as the source of life. In astrology, water symbolizes the repository of all memories. So, when we sit in stillness, quietly connecting with the nothingness, we tap into the vast reservoir of memories held within our bodies, flowing in and out like the air we breathe. It's truly miraculous how we can access this inner depth, but it requires practice, skill, and a trust that can sometimes evolve into something greater—faith. Yes, I said it—faith. I used to dislike this word for most of my life, until 2017 when I finally comprehended its meaning. Faith transcends mere trust; it embodies a belief in the mystical and the unknown. It acknowledges that something extraordinary can emerge from what we perceive as nothing. Give it a try for a while, and even if your wildest dreams don't materialize, rest assured that scientists have discovered the remarkable effects it has on your brain and overall well-being. Embracing silence and stillness aids us in profound ways, regardless of the specific outcomes we anticipate. So, take a moment each day to be still, to embrace the silence. Tap into the power of nothingness and unlock the transformative potential within. It may seem unconventional, but the rewards are undeniable—both for your mind and your health. If you need help or support in finding your authentic self, please don't hesitate to reach out to me. I offer workshops and one-on-one coaching to help seekers on their journey. For free resources to help you tap into your authentic voice sign up by going to reneebeyor.com/free-resources.

Starting a virtual bookkeeping business in 2013 freed me up to be more social and experience real fun in my life. In 2016, after two years of swing dancing, I began to explore my newfound freedom and energy. I noticed that leading in swing dancing allowed me to tap into my true core beliefs, which had been dormant after age 27. Unfortunately, I had shut down for many years and only rediscovered my passions at age 39. As a female in CT, it was uncommon to demand the lead position as a swing dancer. However, I stood firm in my decision, even if others saw me as selfish for not assuming the following status. I was determined to stand in my truth and be brave. Leading made me feel sexy, powerful, and outright brazen! One evening, after a swing dance social, where I felt the buzz and high from being my new found self, a friend shared their dating story with me. They had started dating another dance friend of mine, but before that, they had been dating a "Polyamorous Person." I had no idea what that meant, but as they described it, my body responded with a resounding "YES, THAT IS ME." Walking to my car in a daze, I realized that I had been closeted all this time. Despite priding myself on being out as a bisexual woman, I began to question if I was really out. Did anyone other than my husband or immediate family know about my sexuality? I doubted it, since not only did I not tell anyone unless they asked but especially since so many people believed bisexuality was fake. As I discovered my polyamorous identity over that next year, I realized it was one of the many reasons I had shut down for twelve years. I knew deep down that the world around me didn't align with my values. To conform to its rules, I played small and avoided attention. Expressing my true beliefs would have been risky. However, at the age of 39, I felt safe, secure, and free enough to embrace my identity. Thereafter, it took me three years of trial and error to find people who shared my journey. My coming out was more than just about being polyamorous. It taught me to question the things I accepted without challenging. Our feelings are mysteries that should arouse curiosity and inspire us to ask, "Am I agreeing to something that doesn't align with me, just because it's expected of me?" I'm speaking out for those who can't because I realized that if my new friend hadn't opened up to me that night, I might still be confused about my situation. I wouldn't have felt seen, and I wouldn't have known that there are others out there who express love differently and feel more aligned with their way of life. But let me be clear: this story isn't just about being polyamorous. It's about questioning the things we agree to. It's about being brave enough to say, "No, that's not how I do things," and forging our own paths. We need more people to be curious about the systems and structures that shape our lives, rather than simply accepting black-and-white decisions. For me, polyamory wasn't just about being monogamous or not—it was about whether I believed love is infinite and what I want to stand for. I challenge you to listen to your emotional body and recognize when the system you're in isn't meeting your needs. Look for your gray zone—the place that's natural and nuanced, rather than artificial and comfortable. If you need help or support in finding your authentic self, please don't hesitate to reach out to me. I offer workshops and one-on-one coaching to help seekers on their journey. For free resources to help you tap into your authentic voice sign up by going to reneebeyor.com/free-resources.

You know what they say, "old habits die hard." And if I don't keep up with my routine, I'm liable to turn into a hot mess express - a place I thought I had moved away from like a house haunted by ghosts. Back in the day, I'd wake up and run to work like a chicken with its head cut off, chugging coffee like it was going out of style. And lunch? Let's just say my bank account was not a fan. With my sensitive nature, I was always picked to be the office doormat for the overbearing types. Saying "no" was like saying Voldemort's name, while "yes" had to be done with a snap of the fingers like I was a magician. Once the clock hit five, I'd race home, throw on some sweatpants, and order takeout with my significant other. We'd binge-watch TV until our eyes turned into raisins. I was so bored I could scream, but I promised myself I wouldn't turn into my parents. The only thing missing from the equation was a ton of chores that would suck my energy dry. And here's the kicker - I thought my soul was being fed by watching fun shows and indulging in tasty treats, but it turns out my ego was the one chomping at the bit to avoid fear, loss, and doubt. Listen, if this sounds like you, I'm sending you a virtual hug. You might be dealing with depression, inflammation, and a severe case of loneliness. Believe me, I've been there. Mysterious illnesses, rashes, and excruciating pain plagued me in my 30s. But instead of facing the music, I was in denial like a kid who didn't want to go to bed. It wasn't until a few things happened that I realized I needed to treat my body like the precious gem it is. I had to pay attention, or else I'd fall so deep into depression that the only way out would be the big S word. But I pulled myself up by the bootstraps and got the help I needed. And you know what gave me the final push? My work environment. First, I worked at a company filled with womanizers and alcoholics - a party I did not want to attend. Then, I moved onto a boss duo that made Maleficent look like a saint. Let me show you how I got my life back with some fun tricks to keep you sane and on track every moment of your day. The Magnetic Smile guide provides a how to sheet that I think is a great start to understanding how to stay consistent and slowly add good habits into your life that will make you SMILE! Remind Yourself Daily Why you are doing this! Start Small Stack It Pretend you have Amnesia Count to 5 Backwards & Do It - Mel Robbins way Get an Accountability Buddy Make it FUN! I could explain all of these how to keep steady practices but it would take more than this article was meant for so if you are interested in learning more signup for the FREE Magnetic Smile Guide. It will walk you through the practices and keep you on the straight and narrow! Instead - I want to share with you the fun I have to continuously add into my days or I become a character on MONSTERS INC. This is the first of many steps I will share with you along the way. In return, feel free to share with me what makes you sane. I'd love to hear how you implement it into you day and week. What makes you sane? Series 1: Episode 1 - Getting Dirty I love being in sun, outdoors, and most of all getting dirty. I love it so much I may have another series about how to convene with nature to get in touch with you... so watch for that this summer! More videos on what makes me sane to come.